THE WEDDDING-
- Please Watch E’s: Khole and Lamar Get Married. It will be two hours you never get back and you will be dumber after watching. But it is cant miss-trash TV. If Aliens were watching it for an idea of what we are as a people, this episode would sum us up completely!
The Proposal- The Courtship-Real romantic. I am sure Odom read a ton of Shakespeare in high school. He sounded like Rocky Balboa. “ Ay yo-you like wanna like get married to me”? He didn’t even have a ring for that Mess. His wedding proposal, was really what every girl dreams about. No ring. No parental permission. Not getting down on one knee. Plus, Married after Two weeks????? 2 weeks? Cmon. At that rate, what did they bang after .2 milliseconds of meeting each other? I am sure she did a great job of holding out on him. I never thought I would say it. But Kim was being smart and reasonable saying they were moving to fast. God help us.
Pastor Brad- This guy 100% putts from the rough. He is dressed like Elton John in one scene. Then he marries them in John Gotti Chrome-Pin stripped suit. Awesome. Here 100% will be doing the services at my wedding.
Vera-Wang- I am sure she never thought she would have to make a wedding dress for a sumo wrestler. The word beautiful and Bride. Should not be used on the same page, in regards to Khloe. She looked like a T-Rex with a wedding dress on.
Spray paint- These girls without makeup look awful. They all look like the wicked witch of the west. Hook nosed, chin hair and warts all over their faces. The magic of movie makeup.
Kissie Face-How repulsive and disgusting were the kissing scenes between Odom and Khlostadon? They looked like two wild animals fighting over a bone. And who the F makes out at dinner with their mother? Dangerous Donna would stab the slut in the neck if that’s stuff was going on across the table from her. Their wedding kiss looked liked something out of a late night movie on Cinemax.
Rob-The brother- This kid really needs a beating. He did have a Funny line “Lamar game me this incense” No that is weed, idiot! His ex-girlfriend finally came to her senses and realized he is a D list celebrity, with no job. Sayonara sucker! She is in N.Y banging David Wright.
Bruce-Step Dad- Why did his hair look like Edward scissor hands in a few scenes? I did tear up when he made his speech and when he was getting abused by the family. I feel so bad he is married to that mental midget Kris. Christ that women needs a new haircut. If he really wants to avoid situations like this with his daughters/Step daughter’s maybe they should not be running around dressed like whores. I was going to call child services about the outfits the 11 year old twins were wearing. Bruce, put some clothes on those little sluts in training.
MY NEW MAN CRUSH- Move over Kurt Russell and Fred Nein. Scott is my new man crush. This dude is hilarious. He was rocking that pimp Liberace bathrobe, drinking wine at 10am. He RULES! His hair is so money, it’s like Johnny Depp’s in the 80’s. His shoe collection is to die for! Did you see those leopard slippers, PIMP????. This kid is so Vogue. I need a new Best friend. I wish he had a show on MTV. Become Scotts BFF. I would 100% win.
The Wedding Speeches. Courtney and Kim’s were really wonderful. Pause. NOT. They didn’t write anything down because they are fucking illiterate. Lamar crying? How sweet and sensitive. I am sure the boys back in south Jamaica were real proud of his little bitch side. Isn’t this like the 3x he has been married? Or does he just have baby mamas?
The KURSE of KHLOE- You heard it here first! The L.A Lakers will become the L.A Clippers of the N.B.A. They have officially will not win another N.B.A championship for 100 years. Need Proof?? Check Odom’s stats this year. Down in points scored along with his FG% from a year ago and way below his career average.
This will be similar to the curse of the Bambino (Red Sox) and The Billy Goat (Cubs). I figure she is both a slob and an Animal; this curse may be twice as long. Sorry Lakers Fans. The run was good while it lasted. Knicks in 2011.
The Baby Mama Solution. Lamar has found the answer to what has been plaguing NBA/Athletes since the beginning of T.V how to have as few babies-baby mama’s as possible. Simple. Marry a Tranny! Simple. That one semester at Rhode Island is going to save him $$$ on child support!
But in the, love conquers all. I hope they make it until 2011. But don't count on it.
ELECTION DAY 2009.
I think more people read my posting last Tuesday that who actually voted. Which is flattering to me, but very sad for the state of my peers. How many of you did actually vote? Be honest? I am neither hear nor there on Leprechaun Mike Bloomy. Just the fact he changed term limits for himself, raises the red flag.
Also the fact he called Jay-Z “A truly Great New Yorker” is wild. Yes I own all his CD’s (mostly bootlegs) But Mayor Mike, someone who sold crack, talks about pimping and robbing in the 5 boroughs. He lives in Jersey as well, he doesn't pay city taxes! This constitutes a good New Yorker? What a Joke. The Pic above is him throwing the first pitch out for Irish Day at Citi Field.
A-Rod: Congrats you won the World Series. Nice Fedora you stiff-quiff.
Daily News/N.Y Post- I am glad you guys had hundreds of articles covering the parade but only 2 covering the FT Hood Massacre. People would probably Care more about each other and the world if they knew what was going on. As for FT Hood, God Bless those lost.
Also the military is so worried about gays joining, but not Muslim terrorists? Great job on that one.
Next Week:
I Twitter/Tweet for people. Why I love girls in hoop Earrings and discuss cheaters.
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