TIGER.

Unleash Tiger on the Jersey Shore!

I will now Putt in on the Tiger Woods situation. I am officially a new fan of Tiger Woods! Yes a new-true FAN! I might even start playing Golf because of him.

This guy shed some light on a few things in the past two weeks.

1. He does not putt from the rough, like many originally thought.

2. Women are getting worse and worse as Gold Diggers/Whores/”Marital prostitutes”.

3. A Pre-nuptial agreement is a MUST. Especially when you marry a broke hoe.

I used to hate Tiger and his buck-toothed Mr. Perfect image. Now, I realize he did it for the money. He just said to himself “Smile and Pay up mother fuckers”! I am a Billionaire Hustler. He didn’t want to act like that. He wants to say Fachizzle and get neck Tattoo’s.

Tag, Nike, Buick, McDonalds, Golf Digest, Gatorade and whoever else has paid this guy Millions! So I can’t hate on him and it is truly messed up his sponsors are not “renewing” their contracts with him. F them, and in two years when this whole thing blows over and they want to sponsor him again-he should say F.U!! Or Double his RATE. Tiger can play golf and by doing just that he sells products.

Tiger is a Cheater. Plain and simple. Cheating is wrong, yes. But he did not kill anyone, or cheat something/someone for a monetary profit, or affect anyone’s life directly except his families. So cut him some slack and back the F up off my new BOY!!!

97% of the readers of this site have cheated on their girlfriend/boyfriends before, and even a few have cheated on that person with ME! So don’t judge the man until you walk in his Golf Shoes.

Tiger does not care mentally or emotionally that he got caught cheating.

The guy has nerves of steel and ice in his veins. He just wants to do what he does best, play golf and plow women out.

I will give some Yankee love right now: Derek Jeter (who isn’t that good looking, lets be real) has slung his sausage all around NYC and around the country for the past 13 years. No marriages, No baby mama Drama, Nothing. He sewed his wild Oats. Now that he is in his twilight and wants to commit, he is doing it easily. So Millionaire/Athletes/Men learn from Jeter.

I do blame his whore of a wife for this whole entire thing along with women-(some) in general for their hunger and desire for money! Yes, it is sad but true! She married him for the Cash people. Plain and simple.

How many girls in High School/College say- “I can’t wait to blow the captain of the golf team” “Yes, I am the lucky girlfriend of the #1 bowler at the school”. Answer. NONE

Girls want to date the Quarterbacks, Basketball players, Baseball players and Bartenders. Then later on in life, they want the guy with the big fat BANK Account. Need Proof? I am sure Melina Trump loves seeing the Donald Naked and just insists on having sex with the lights on! I am sure she tells him “it is that time of the month” 365 days a year.

So dry you freaking tears for this Swede Skank. She knew what she was doing. You know the old saying. “If the cooking is good at home, you don’t eat out”. Maybe the Swede should work on her bedroom game, the same way Tiger worked on his Golf Game.

Also let’s not forget she chased him with a golf club and threw a cell phone which chipped his tooth. Crazy? I think so!

Did you really think she liked watching him play Golf? Always walking up and down the courses at the butt crack of dawn?

Now she is going to get paid. I am pretty sure he had more money when they met and that during their marriage she really didn’t add too much to the Bank Accounts and their 401K plan. I don’t think she should walk away with a few golf clubs and umbrella, but I don’t think she deserves millions! Give her a million a year for their marriage and a one way ticket back to Stockholm.

Tigers 2^nd Chance.

We have not heard the last from Tiger either. As much as we love knocking people from down from the top spot, then spitting and peeing on them while they are at their lowest. We like comebacks even more. If former hooker/whore Ashlee Dupree can write an advice column for the N.Y Post. Tiger can come back! He will roar again. On the golf course I mean.

Jersey Shore Week #2-Synposis/Notes

It was toned down a bit from week one. I hope its downward spiral does not continue. I guess only being one hour instead of two was the big difference. Also the tease of the upcoming punch left me salivating.

Angelina has left the house. Her work ethic and attitude really helped improve the image of girls from Staten Island (Excluding you Laur and Nise’). But this girl is a fucking joke. Dating a married man, not wanting to go to work, telling her boss to whom she just screwed over that she would only talk to him in the bathroom. 100% Class. I am all too familiar with the Staten Island girl Bathroom trick. Lets just say, she would have kept her job, maybe even gotten a management position afterwards. It is a shame she left the show, I love watching cock blockers in action and love it even more when they acknowledge their intentions of trying to do so. I guess for now she is back working at the tanning Salon on Todt Hill Road. See you soon Angie!

(They should get a replacement for her right?? Maybe Tommy Cheeseballs)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6upatWc7bQ

Ronnie- Jesus you had some potential as coming out of this show with some hope. A chance at being taken seriously in life. Maybe even Hollywood. Then comes the Faux Hawk hair do and the Parkinson’s disease Dance moves. It looked as if you were going through electro-shock treatment. Muhammad Ali and Michael J Fox said damn that guy has the shakes. I still have hope for you buddy. Good luck.

JWowww- Christ. Your Skunk hair keeps looking worse and worse. You looked Part Medusa and part Bob Marley in this last week’s episode. Tame that thing! If you got shot in the face a person could claim your hair was a wild Rabid Raccoon and it was self defense. Also please wash your face and gargle some Scope in the mornings before you go on camera. You look and sound like Marge Simpsons sister Thelma. I did love the Jordan Sandals, did you steal those from my girl A.J’s closet? They were sexy. I am also not surprised your boyfriend had that little thin Wankster beard. He looked like the character from the OFFSRPING video “Pretty fly for a White guy”. I am still waiting for you to bite a guys head off. Hopefully it will happen soon.

Vinny- Kind of weak this episode. Step your game up.

Pauley D- The Pride of Rhode Island. You were also weak this episode. I hope you dick rick didn’t get yanked off yet. But I am sure you’re happy that Tranny Jwoww is single. Just keep the hair high and hard! Fist Pump on!

Snookie-Not shocked you eat pickles every day, but you don’t have to do it so openly. Why the F are you getting more Orange! Your friend Ryder seems real classy, not. I did enjoy your make out session as did the whole male species. It doesn’t matter that it was two slobs, boys will be boys and we love girls making out!

I am still waiting for you to get punched in the face. I know it hurt you, but I bet it taught you a lesson. I am sure you think twice about talking slick to guys and now are way more susceptible to flinching. I also raised my drink to that guy who punched you for making progress in the fight to make it o.k. for a man to smack a hoe when necessary!

The Situation- Jesus Christ. You take over the crown of king make-out. I am not going to give you and props for hooking up with snookie. I am upset you didn’t try to take down Ryder and Snookie for a little 3 way action. Your killer instinct is lacking. That was a lay-up. Also please, stop wearing Argyle that is a sad situation. Don’t sweat the Gray hair. Just for Men, works. I will be stealing your line “Half-assed Fire Cracker” that was classic.

Quiz:

We play match the quote with the girl: Answers are at the bottom. (You will be surprised)

I asked three girls the following question. “Wanna go see the Tree and grab dinner”?

1. 25 year old blonde Nurse

2. 28 year old Jewish publicist

3. 19 year old makeup artist.

1. Dinner yea, but why the F would I want to go see the Tree?
2. Do I need I.D for it?
3. They didn’t take it down yet?

Other Notes:

-Tom Brady Just had a baby with super model Gisele Bundchen had a baby boy this week. Tiger Woods has his fingers cross the paternity test come back negative and it is Brady’s baby, not his.

-I had an adult sleepover this past weekend. Very pretty girl. She woke up and her first words were “I want Taco Bell”. Soul Mate?

-How funny is it now that there are Public Service announcements about sending/taking naked pictures. Girls, don’t believe the commercials. Your bodies are beautiful, keep sharing them. And no us guys don’t share the pictures with our friends. Wink-Wink.

A theory about the Cold Weather:

I love the cold. I am not crazy. I just love to ski and the whole Christmas season. I also love to go to bars and know that if a girl goes out in this weather, she is single and ready to get down. Here is the logic-If a girl has a boyfriend and it is freezing she is going to convince him to stay in. If she has to go out, he goes with her. If she wants to go out and her boyfriend stays home, hmmmm- relationship issues. So in reality a girl who goes out in the cold is easy-prey, begging to be slaughtered.

Answers to Match game.

1. C

2. B

3. A

A Brief Good Bye:

I am letting everyone know this is my last blog until January 4^th 2010. I apologize but I am on vacation and need some Me Time. I am going to China and Korea for 10 days. I am sure it will be very entertaining. I promise. I will be refreshed and energized for the New Year. One Love.